Asking Deep Questions
by Jason Thompson
Jesus was the master of insightful, piercing and deep questions. The questions he posed went straight to a person’s heart. Questions like….
“Who do you say I am?” (Matt 16:15),
“Do you want to get well?” (John 5:6),
“Why are you so afraid?” (Matt 8:26)
“Why did you doubt?” (Matt 14:31),
“Are you also going to leave?” (John 6:67),
“Do you love me?” (John 21:15-17)
Man, did Jesus ever get to the point with a simple question!
We want to grow as leaders who emulate Jesus in asking penetrating questions. Questions that require people to pause, reflect and consider their hearts, attitudes and longings as well as the world and its subtle and at times not so subtle influence.
I find that an insightful question leaves people with much to reflect upon not only when we are together but long after our time together. Sure, i ask people “how they are doing?” but that question can to often be answered vaguely.
So, i wanted to offer a few questions that we could use to help people grow in recognizing how God is working in their lives. and in becoming more self aware.
QUESTIONS
1 How have you seen Jesus working in your life?
2 What is something that has struck you as you have been reading the Bible? Why?
3 What is a name of God that is particularly relevant to you right now? Why?
4 What are you anxious about?
5 What gives you joy lately?
6 What is one area of your life that you would like to see change? What steps do you need to make to see that change take place?
7 Who is someone you are actively praying for to follow Jesus with their whole life? What is Jesus asking you to do to share and be good news to that person?
8 In what ways is your marriage thriving? In what ways does it need to grow?
9 In what ways are you thriving in your singleness? In what ways do you need to grow in your singleness?
10 Is there anyone that you need to forgive, or working through forgiving? What things are you doing to not have an offended heart?
11 Where is a place in your life that you are struggling right now?
12 What are hopes or dreams that God has put in your heart?
13 How do you want to be more like Jesus in the next 6 months or year? What are some steps you need to take in becoming more like him?
14 How is your time alone with Jesus?
15 How can i pray for you?
This is just a few examples of questions that I have used to grow deeper in relationship with others and to help them to grow as followers of Jesus. When we ask such questions, we want to listen. Without judgement, Without bias. Without ulterior motives. It’s the worst when someone asks a question as an opener for them to then barrage us with all that they think we should do. Simply listen. The point of deep questions is to help people turn their thoughts and hearts to God and reflect on their own life. Through asking questions, we make space for Jesus to lead. He does the shaping of their hearts and lives in response to deep questions. Of course, their may be times to make suggestions in response to people’s answers, but let’s be quick to listen first. As we listen, we are better able to ask further questions and know how to pray for people specifically. It is also very important to remember what was shared for future conversations. People feel loved and cared for when they know they have been heard and that we remembered what they shared.
FATHER LED QUESTONS
Jesus himself said that he spoke as the Father led him (Jn 12:49). Another facet of asking questions in discipleship is being led by the Father. So many times, I have been with someone and a seemingly random question comes to mind that is a prompt from God for me to ask. Be brave. If you feel as if the Lord might give you a question to ask, be obedient and ask it. As well, when I know I am meeting with someone, I will pray and ask the Lord if there is anything he wants me to ask that person. Sometimes the Lord gives me a question for that person. Be open to the Lord directing you in your conversations.
I pray that all of us grow as those who ask deep questions. Jesus was a master at asking a question that went straight to the heart or a situation. Let’s emulate him in asking deep questions of others.
